


Peter Parker and Tony Stark's Normal (or not so normal) Life Online

by TheIronMechanic



Series: Tony Stark is a great father-figure series [3]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Gen, Social Media, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure, Twitter, YouTube
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-03
Updated: 2020-10-27
Packaged: 2021-03-01 07:20:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 15,665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23467528
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheIronMechanic/pseuds/TheIronMechanic
Summary: Bits of Tony and Peter's time together get published on Youtube by Peter himself. The world just loves them. Who wouldn't?
Relationships: Pepper Potts/Tony Stark, Peter Parker & Tony Stark
Series: Tony Stark is a great father-figure series [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1687837
Comments: 49
Kudos: 594





	1. Tony Stark vs Dumm-E (The never-ending saga)

**Author's Note:**

> Here's something new I'm trying. Hope you enjoy it! Btw I'm sorry if it gets all messed up at the end if you are reading with your phone, it looks better on a computer.  
> And as always, English is not my first language, so all mistakes are mine.

“And here’s my table. Here’s where I do my stuff, Mr. Stark leaves some projects for me to finish here and there I plan everything so that he can check it out later.”

He promised Ned he would show him what Mr. Stark’s lab looked like, he couldn’t convince the man to bring Ned though, so a video will have to do. And that’s what he’s doing, his table is kind of a mess right now but he’s sure his best friend won’t mind, he will be too focused on fangirling anyway.

“Oh! And here is where Mr. Stark does-“

“Dumm-E! What did I tell you?! No more smoothies!” The older man screams in the background, startling Peter who turns around, the camera focusing on his mentor now. “Stop it or I swear to God I will take you apart and give each of your pieces to people all over the country so that you don’t get rebuilt.”

Visibly annoyed, Mr. Stark takes the cup away from Dumm-E going straight to the sink and draining it all. With a scoff, he takes a paper cap with the word ‘Dunce’ written in capital letters and without hesitation, puts it on the robot’s head. Dumm-E still in the same place lowers his claw, kind of ashamed and chirps.

“No, don’t do that to me. You know it won’t work. You’ve earned it. You _know_ you can’t do that. Last time you made me a smoothie I puked for days. _Days_ Dumm-E. And I _specifically_ told you to not do it again. You agreed remember?” The small robot chirps again “Of course you remember, you are not that stupid.” His claw went even lower. “No, I didn’t mean that. You are not stupid, I’m sorry. Just-“ The man sights, crouching down in front of the robot “don’t do it again, okay buddy? Can you do that for me?” At the soft tone, Dumm-E lifts his claw once again, moving it up and down. “Of course you can. Good boy.” Mr. Stark pats his ‘head’ slightly and gets back up.

Peter, still filming everything, approaches the robot and copies his mentor. He gets down to his level and pats his ‘head’ with a smile on his face, trying not to let the cap fall off his head. He changes to his phone’s inner camera and gets the robot and himself in the shot.

“So as you’ve heard Mr. Stark, this is Dumm-E. He’s kind of all over the place sometimes, but he’s a good boy. Aren’t you Dumm-E?” At the mention of his name, he chirps a couple of times, getting closer to Peter, his arm moving towards the camera. “No Dumm-E, don’t touch the camera it might-”

“What are you doing with Dumm-E kid? He’s in timeout, you’ll play with him later, okay?” Mr. Stark’s voice makes him turn his head and get up. With a soft apologetic smile, he says goodbye to the robot, changes the camera angle and goes to his mentor’s table.

“Don’t you think you were a little harsh Mr. Stark?”

“Look kid, I-“ The older man directs his attention towards him, but when he sees the camera he stops talking. With a raised eyebrow he looks directly at it. “What are you doing?”

“Oh, this? I was just filming the things I do on my workbench for Ned, and I thought you wouldn’t mind if I filmed the rest of the lab.”

“Oh, yeah.” Still with a raised eyebrow, he looks between the camera and his mentee, finally turning to continue working on his project. “Just don’t film important stuff that can’t get out of here, okay?”

“Yeah, sure Mr. Stark. Thank you!” He goes to film the Iron Man suits, something he also promised his best friend he would do. “So this are _all_ the Iron Man suits that Mr. Stark still has, they are so cool. Like look-“

“Dumm-E what did I _just_ tell you! You are going to be the death of me! That’s it come here, you are getting dismantled. Don’t! Stop you doofus! Don’t you dare run. Dumm-E I swear to everything that’s Holy. Come here!”

**Youtube**

**_Tony Stark vs Dumm-E (The never-ending saga)_ **

_[_ Video attached _]_

_125.368 views_

Comments:

@StarkRavingHazelNUTs

_Omg. He’s so precious. He acts like a dad and I love it._

356 likes 287 comments

@Avengerzzz

_Who is this kid? How did he get to be in Tony Stark’s lab?_

178 likes 965 comments

@StarkMan

_What’s it to you dude? If he gives us this kind of content, he can be whoever he wants._

452 likes 132 comments

@BuzzFeed

_Is this Tony Stark’s illegitimate son? Check out our newest video for more info!_

1632 likes 847 comments

@CaptainsASS

_Oh, shit. Could you imagine? They kinda look alike if you ask me._

264 likes 76 comments

**Twitter**

The Daily Bugle _@TheDailyBugle_

_Does Tony Stark have an illegitimate son? Did he hide him from the world all this time? Read for more!_

_[_ Attached link _]_

146 RT 79 Likes

You Know Who I Am @ _TonyEStark_

_Just want everyone to know that even after all the threats I used against Dumm-E he is_ still _in my lab and_ still _making me smoothies with motor oil._

_1.8M RT_ _2.9M Likes_

You Know Who I Am @ _TonyEStark_

_And by the way, he is my personal intern, not my son. Creeps. And I promised I would mention him, but I’m not going to. So there you have it kid, betrayed by your own mentor._

1.1M RT 5.8M Likes

Peter Internman _@UnderscoreParker_

_That’s rude Mr. Stark. You promised. If you keep doing this, I won’t let you be on the next video I publish._

15k RT 12k Likes

You Know Who I Am @ _TonyEStark_

_I hope that’s not the best threat you’ve got. You better learn from the master. And by the way, I didn't even ask to be in it._

2.9M RT 1.6M Likes

Peter Internman _@UnderscoreParker_

_Rude._

12k RT 9k Likes


	2. Pun Fun With Mr. Stark

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Puns. Who doesn't love puns? Mr. Tony Stark.  
> What is Peter going to do? Annoy Mr. Tony Stark with puns of course.

**_Day 1_ **

“Well, seeing how much you guys liked the video I posted the other day, I have decided to annoy Mr. Stark, film it and then post it so the whole world sees.” Peter says smiling wildly to the camera.

“And how will I annoy him, you ask? Well, you see.” He sets the camera down on the table. Looking around, making sure Mr. Stark is nowhere to be seen he sits down on his chair, crossing his arms on top of the table and resting his head on them. “Mr. Stark’s biggest problem with me is that I _love_ puns, but he absolutely. 100%. Swear on his heart. _Hates_ them.” He giggles. “Well, I for one, think my puns are hilarious. My friend Ned thinks so too, and my aunt always laughs at them, but I feel like she’s just faking most of the time though, so that doesn’t count.  Anyway, so this is what I’m going to do. I’m going to try to say as many puns as I can. _But_. They have to fit in the conversation, so I can’t just say a lot of puns that aren’t co-related. I don’t know if I’m explaining myself, I’m really bad at this stuff. But let's just try this. Wish me luck.”

*Cut*

Sitting in the same chair, but this time working on something, Peter looks slightly to the camera. Suddenly, the billionaire’s voice echos around the room.

“Kid? Can you come here for a second?” Peter’s eyes light up as he gets up taking the camera with him, changing the angle.

“Here we go.” The teen whispers.

*Cut*

“So that’s it, thanks Pete.” The man sets the screwdriver he is holding on the table. “Are you going to film everything now?” He raises an eyebrow.

“Uhm, yeah. People love to see it!”

“Yeah, but I don’t think they love seeing these stuff kid.” Mr. Stark sits back on his chair. 

“Maybe you are right.”

“But anyway, how was school?” The man asks without looking at him. Peter quickly points the camera towards him, smirking with a glint in his eyes.

“Well, it was pretty uneventful, but Ned and I learned something today in biology.”

“Oh, yeah? What was it?”

“Do you know how many tickles it takes to make a jellyfish laugh?” The billionaire doesn’t look up from his computer but responds anyway.

“Jellyfish do not have a central nervous system or brain, therefore they could not fell you ‘tickling’ them. But fine, I’ll humor you. How many?”

“TEN-tickles!” Peter laughs loudly behind the camera. Mr. Stark’s shoulders tense as he turns towards the kid, disbelief written all over his face. Not saying another word as the boy keeps laughing, he runs his hand over his face, sighting.

“Go back to your worktable kid. That was awful.” The boy in question, still laughing starts going towards his table once again, changing his phone to selfie mode.

“Pun one done, some more to go.” 

*Cut*

**_Day 2_ **

“So that’s how you find the answer to that.” Mr. Stark, leaning on Peter’s table is helping him with one of his math’s assignments. 

“Oh God, thanks Mr. Stark, you saved my life. I couldn’t get this done. I tried everything.” He sights with relief.

“Well, the answer wasn’t all that difficult kid, the process was the hard part and you got almost all of it right.” The billionaire runs a hand through the kid's hair, making him smile.

“It’s just that what kind of problem has an answer that is just zero?”

“A lot of them do kid.” Mr. Stark stands straight, letting his hands fall on Peter’s shoulders.

“Well, to the guy who invented zero, thanks for nothing.” The kid smiles wide, looking at the screen of his phone, recording the man’s reaction. Before Peter gets a chance to laugh, Mr. Stark is pulling away, smacking the boy’s head slightly and walking away.

“Stop it with the stupid puns Peter!” The only sound in the room is the kid’s laugh and the man’s footsteps.

*Cut*

**_Day 3_ **

“Thanks for the pizza Mr. Stark, it is _so_ good.” Sitting on the penthouse’s couch, Peter and Mr. Stark are eating pizza, the TV can be heard in the background.

“It’s nothing kid.” The man says after getting another slice.

“Can you pass me the Fanta please?” The billionaire passes it to him without taking his eyes off the TV. Peter takes it, drinks, sets it on the table next to the pizza and looks at the camera. “You know Mr. Stark? I had the craziest dream last night. I was swimming in an ocean of orange soda.” Peter stops, for dramatic effect, you know? “Turns out it was just a _Fanta sea_ ” The kid starts laughing uncontrollably.

Turning his head to look at his mentee, Mr. Stark opens and closes his mouth, nothing coming out of it. He then takes the remote and turns off the TV.

“That’s it. I’m done” He gets up and leaves. At that, the kid just laughs even harder.

*Cut*

**_Day 4_ **

“Mr. Stark! Mr. Stark!” Peter runs inside the lab, where the genius is working on one of his suits. “Friday almost trapped me inside the elevator!”

“What?” The camera, focused on Mr. Stark shakes slightly at the kid’s erratic movements. “Why would she do that?”

“She just did! I don’t know why! It stopped in a floor that wasn’t this one, like 2 floors below, and when I told her to go to this one instead, she wouldn’t move! Then the doors closed and it didn’t go up for a solid 2 minutes!” 

Setting his wrench on the table, the man gets up and starts walking towards the kid. “Why didn’t you get off the elevator and walked up the stairs?” He stops in front of him, the camera only capturing his face and arms crossed over his chest.

“Because! Mr. Stark I don’t trust stairs.” Moving slightly, he starts whispering. “They are always up to something.”

Letting out a dramatic sight, the billionaire drops his head slightly, looking at his shoes. The kid just laughs behind the camera. The man, annoyed but with a small smile on his face, tries to take away the camera from his hands, Peter just backs off.

“I swear to God kid, if you don’t stop with your stupid puns I’ll kick you out and take you out from my will.” He starts walking to his table once again. Peter stops laughing suddenly, pointing the camera at his shocked face.

“I’m in your will?”

“Not for long kid if you keep this up!”

*Cut*

“So that’s all the puns I’ve got for this video.” Sitting in his bed, Peter yawns. “I think I annoyed Mr. Stark enough these last 4 days, I’m going to let him breath. _For a bit_.” A mischievous smile plastered all over his face. “Anyway, it’s late. I’m going to bed and edit everything tomorrow. See you on the next video!” He sets his phone on the bed. Not realizing the camera is still on, you can hear him on the background whispering “I can’t believe I’m in his will. I’m in Tony _freaking_ Stark’s will.”

**Youtube**

**_Pun Fun With Mr. Stark_ **

_[_ Video attached _]_

_589.452 views_

Comments:

@Stark4Life

_Have you seen how he just smiles at him even though he is annoyed as hell? That’s dad love. Tony Stark is turning into a dad_

804 likes 358 comments

@AssembleNow

_This dude’s puns are horrible but Stark’s reactions are hilarious. I just wished they could do it with the whole gang of Avengers, too bad everything has gone to s*it._

603 likes 470 comments

**Twitter**

You Know Who I Am @ _TonyEStark_

_Why I still keep you around is a mystery to me. You throw bad puns at me day in and day out, post it on Youtube and I still keep you on my will @UnderscoreParker? I might have to get that checked out._

5.8M RT 9.5M Likes

Peter Internman _@UnderscoreParker_

_You keep me around because you love me and my puns Mr. Stark. Don’t try to hide it. And I better have one of your cars on that will of yours @TonyEStark_

284k RT 598k Likes

You Know Who I Am @ _TonyEStark_

_That’s all you want? Well then, I guess I’ll have to change it, I gave you way too much. @PepperPotts can you deal with it?_

4.7M RT 10.6M Likes

Pepper Potts @PepperPotts

_I don’t want to be a part of any of this Tony so you change it yourself. I told you from the beginning you were giving him too much @TonyEStark_

145k RT 1.7M Likes

Peter Internman _@UnderscoreParker_

_Wait wait wait, I didn’t mean that’s all I wanted. I meant I wanted at least that. Please don’t erase anything. Please :) @TonyEStark @PepperPotts_

129k RT 1M Likes

You Know Who I Am @ _TonyEStark_

_Too late kiddo._

4.8M RT 15M Likes

Peter Internman _@UnderscoreParker_

_And I oop_

2M RT 4.8M Likes

_StarkShark @SharkoStarko_

_The kid’s getting sassy. I love it. I am a fan. By the way I love your puns @UnderscoreParker_

_10.7k_ RT 15.9k Likes

Peter Internman _@UnderscoreParker_

_Thanks! Glad to find someone who finally understands and enjoys my craft._

123k RT 3 95k Likes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't forget to leave kudos and comments, they help a lot.  
> If you've got an idea for a chapter, just leave a comment!


	3. Cheesy Mr. Stark in His Natural Habitat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love Pepperony so here you have some love.
> 
> As always, English is not my first language so all mistakes are mine.

“Hey guys! Great news, I’m staying with Mr. Stark for a _whole_ week! I’m super excited, you have no idea.” Peter sitting cross-legged on the penthouse’s couch, fidgets with his fingers. “I’ve never stayed here before, but I would be staying alone in my house and for some reason * _cough_ * _helicopter parent *cough*_ Mr. Stark wouldn’t let me. So here I am, at my mentor’s house, _alone_.” Peter rolls his eyes at the irony. “But anyway, I’ll be taking you along with me. I’ll probably do several videos about different stuff that happens this week, but we’ll see.” He stands up, grabs the camera and films himself at a mirror. “By the way, I’ve got a real camera now. So let’s see how this goes.” He does a peace sign and the image turns black. A disclaimer appears on the screen

‘ _Disclaimer_

_The following images show too much cheesiness._

_If you are allergic to cheese, please don’t sue me._

_Mr. Stark is obsessed with Ms. Potts._

_Sue him._

_Thanks’_

**_Daily PepperonyTM: Cheesy Mr. Stark in His Natural Habitat_ **

**_Day 1_ **

“Hey Mr. Stark-“ Peter walks to the kitchen, camera in hand looking for his mentor, thinking that he would be making coffee by himself. Instead he finds him leaning on the kitchen counter right in front Ms. Potts. Trying not to get spotted he stops, trying not to make any noise.

“Come on Pep, you know I love it.” He grabs her hands, rubbing them softly. “Please?” He smiles softly.

“Do what Tony?” She sights, eating another grape out of her bowl.

“The thing that you know always makes me happy.” Peter sees Pepper drop her head, then Mr. Stark puts a hand on her chin softly, making her look at him. From his angle, Peter sees her face clearly, a radiant smile on her face. 

“Thank you.” The man gently presses a kiss on Ms. Potts forehead. Silence reigns the room for a couple of seconds before it’s broken by Peter’s sniffles. Suddenly, Mr. Stark looks at him and runs a hand over his face, sighting. “How long have you been standing there kiddo?”

“That was the most beautiful thing ever! Mr. Stark you are such a softie! That was just so cute!” He starts to walk towards them, Pepper’s face completely blushed, while Tony has his head on his hands over the counter.

“I’m going to kill you if you post that kid.” Pepper giggles, Peter’s sniffles stop.

“Wha- Why? That’s so cute Mr. Stark!”

“I’ve got a reputation to maintain.” The woman laughs along with Peter. Finally looking up, Mr. Stark grabs his camera. “Stop this, I’m se-“

* _Cut*_

**_Day 2_ **

“Where are we going Mr. Stark?” Peter’s walking along with his mentor, clearly on Stark Tower by the views on the windows.

“ _You_ are going to the waiting room, _I_ am going to a meeting, which-“ he looks at his watch “I’m _so_ late to.” He fixes his tie. “Pepper’s going to kill me.”

“Probably, yeah.”

“Thanks for the reassurance kid.” Peter laughs, Tony just scoffs, a small smile on his face. The camera films the corridor, focusing on a person at the end, Ms. Potts. They walk quickly towards her, the closer they get, the clearer her annoyed face gets.

“I’m sorry Pep, I didn’t mean to be late. I just-“

“He got distracted looking at pictures of you on his phone and didn’t realize what time it was.” Both adult s' heads turn to look at him. Mr. Stark starts to blush like mad, meanwhile Ms. Potts’ features soften.

“Was he now?” She looks at Tony, a smirk on her face.

“I- I didn’t-“ He looks between Pepper and Peter, looking for something to say. He stops his gaze on Peter and whispers. “I’m going to kill you.” He then turns to Pepper and drops his head slightly. “Yes, sorry. I didn’t mean-“ His sentence is cut short by Pepper, who grabs his face and kisses him straight in the mouth.

An ‘eww’ sounds behind the camera, then both adults separate, breathless.

“That was disgustingly cute. Ew.”

“That’s what you get kid.” Tony ruffles Peter’s head and follows Pepper inside the meeting room. Peter turns the camera to point it at him.

“I didn’t deserved that.”

* _Cut*_

**_Day 4 (Nothing cute happened during Day 3 :( )_ **

Peter sits on the kitchen counter eating his cereal, Ms. Potts visible in the shot arranging some papers on the couch. The clock on the wall behind him shows it’s 7:30am. Suddenly, a sleepy Mr. Stark walks across the shot, going directly towards Pepper.

“I bet 20$ he’s going to give her a morning kiss.” Looking over his shoulder, Peter sees his mentorkiss Pepper’s forehead, then his lips softly. Peter then turns to look at the camera. “He’s just that predictable.”

“Good morning Pep. You look amazing.” He smiles.

“Thanks honey, I would say the same but you know.” She runs a hand up and down his pajama pants. “Bed-hair looks good on you though.”

“Cuuuuute!” Peter singsongs, still sitting on his stool in the kitchen.

“Shut uuuuup.” Tony replies from the couch, his arm over Pepper’s shoulder.

_*Cut*_

**_Day 5_ **

Peter lays flat on the couch, the camera on the table. He puts his arms behind his head and sights.

“They are onto me guys. They’ve been limiting their affection when I’m around. I feel bad, because I’m the reason they aren’t kissing and stuff, which I’m kinda thankful for because I don’t really want to see that. But still, I feel bad because I’m sure they are more affectionate when I’m not around.” He sights “Either way I’m going to try and sneak up on them to try and film some more cuteness.” He gets up, a smirk on his face. “Let’s just hope I don’t catch anything - uhm - inappropriate.”

_*Cut*_

**_Day 7_ **

Peter is sitting cross-legged on the floor, the kitchen right behind him. He’s looking at his phone when Mr. Stark and Ms. Potts walk into the shot, in the kitchen. None of them notice Peter.

“I can’t believe he’s leaving today. It’s been a whole week and I haven’t even noticed.” Tony leans on the counter, eating some blueberries. Pepper stands in front of him, grabbing his hands.

“You’ve been 24/7 with him, I haven’t seen you happier in months. I think having him here has been great for both of us.” Peter, who hasn’t moved still, opens his mouth surprised. Blushing, he smiles softly.

“Yeah, I guess it’s pretty fun having the kid around.” He laughs softly. “I never thought those words would come out of my mouth. _Kid_ and _fun_ in the same sentence.” Pepper gets closer and grabs his face gently with one of her hands, the other still on Tony’s hand.

“You’ve changed a lot since then. _You_ know that, _I_ know that. _Everyone_ knows that.”

“Yeah, I guess it just makes me rethink some things in my life.” Peter shocked, mouths to the camera ‘ _no way’_.

“What things baby?”

“I don’t know. Having a family I guess?” Peter puts both hands on his mouth, trying to silence his little scream. He succeeds, seeing as none of them looks at him.

“You want to-“

“I mean, not right now. I don’t think I’m ready. _Yet_. But I will be, some day.” He smiles and Pepper kisses him. This time, instead of saying anything, Peter lets them have their moment. Smiling from ear to ear, he grabs the camera and turns it off.

* _Cut_ *

**Youtube**

**_Daily PepperonyTM: Cheesy Mr. Stark in His Natural Habitat_ **

_[_ Video attached _]_

_5.9M views_

Comments:

@Pepperony4Life

_Omg they are sooo cute! I hope they have an iron baby soon! They are so perfect for each other. I’m so glad they also have Peter in their lives._

1.2k likes 683 comments

@PottsStarkFanbase

_This is the domestic s*it I want. They melt my heart. I’m sure they’ll be amazing parents, they already are with Peter._

834 likes 498 comments

**Twitter**

You Know Who I Am @ _TonyEStark_

_Yes, I’m madly in love with @PepperPotts. Sue me._

15.9M RT 12.7M Likes

PepperPotts @PepperPotts

_Thank you for all the nice posts we’ve been seeing lately. We appreciate every single one of them. And I love you too @TonyEStark_

3M RT 1.9M Likes

You Know Who I Am @ _TonyEStark_

_By the way @UnderscoreParker, you are lucky I care about you kid, because you would be toast right now. But I’m not letting you come with a camera again when you are with me and Pepper anymore._

8.7M RT 10.6M Likes

Peter Internman _@UnderscoreParker_

_Pepper and me*_

2.1M RT 4.7M Likes

Peter Internman _@UnderscoreParker_

_And btw, rude. I make you trending and that’s how you thank me?_

5.2M RT 8M Likes

You Know Who I Am @ _TonyEStark_

_Shut up. You are walking on a thin_ thin _line._

17M RT 20M Likes

Peter Internman _@UnderscoreParker_

_*Gasp* rUDE_

5.1M RT 6.8M Likes

ParkerStan _@StanningParker_

_They are a literal family. For God’s sake. I love it so much._

30.7k RT 45.9k Likes


	4. My First Real Interview (feat. Annoyed Mr. Stark)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, English is not my first language, so all mistakes are mine.

“Guys guys guys” Peter jumps on the bed with excitement until his head touches the ceiling, leaving a light bump. “Ow” He falls on the bed, his hand on his head, the camera on the ground. “ _Mother trucker dude. That hurt like a butt cheek on a stick_.” He rolls on the bed, trying to get his head to stop hurting. “Shoot! The camera!” He jumps out of bed and grabs it, looking for any cracks. “Oh thank God, it’s okay.” He looks straight into the lens “I better cut this.”

_*Cut*_

Peter is sitting on the floor, leaning his back on the bed. “Guys, you won’t believe this! Drumroll please!” A drumroll effect plays while he mimics the action “I’m doing an interview with Mr. Stark! A real interview! With _Mr. Stark!_ I can’t believe this, it’s going to be so epic!” His phone starts ringing next to the camera, Peter leans over and grabs it. When he looks who the caller ID is, his eyes widen, showing the screen to the camera. A picture of Tony Stark sleeping on the workshop table, his face smudged on the surface, Dumm-E putting motor oil on his coffee, appears under his name. “It’s Mr. Stark!” He turns the phone and sees the picture “Ooops, he _won’t be happy with that_. But whatever, I love that picture.” He picks it up and puts in on speakerphone. “ _Hello there_!” He says with a British accent and contains a laugh.

“ _Uh… hello?_ ” Mr. Stark says from the other side of the line.

“You didn’t get it, did you?” Peter rolls his eyes, looks at the camera and mouthes ‘ _He’s just too old, sorry_ ’

“ _Get what_?”

“Nothing Mr. Stark, don’t worry about it.” He shrugs “But anyway, what’s up?”

“ _What’s up? Kid, I’ve been waiting for you for 15 minutes!_ ” Peter blinks rapidly, his eyes wide.

“Waiting for me? What? Where?”

“ _Are you dumb kid? I’m in the car._ ”

“The car?” He still doesn’t get it.

“ _Yes kid the car! The interview? That starts in 45 minutes?_ ” Peter stills, sights and face palms himself.

“No no no no, that’s today?! I thought it was tomorrow!” He gets up, leaving the camera on the floor. Their voices still clear on the background.

“ _You really are getting dumber every day kid. I told you last night!_ ”

“Sorry Mr. Stark I’m going, I’m going!” Fast steps and closing closets can be heard.

“ _You are wearing the clothes I got you right?_ ” Silence.

“Uh…”

“ _I swear to God kid! Put those clothes on and get down here in five minutes or I’m taking you to the interview with only your underwear!_ ”

“I’m sorryyy!”

_*Cut*_

“He’s not talking to me” The camera is in the front of the car, both Tony and Peter on the shot. “He’s acting _real_ grown-up and he’s not talking to me.” He glares at the billionaire, who continues to face the road.

“You are making us be late. Pepper is going to kill me. And it’s your fault. So yeah kid, I’m not talking to you.” The teenager shrinks on his seat, his arms crossed over his chest, pouting.

“But I already said sorry.” Tony sights.

“I know, kid. But I told you last night. I told you to get everything ready for today and you just said ‘ _Of course Mr. Stark, I won’t be late_ ’” He mimics Peter. “And what do you know? You didn’t.” The car stops on a red light and the older man finally looks at him. Tony sees his wrinkled shirt and extends his hands towards it, trying to get it right. “Just don’t do it again. _Capisce?_ ” The light turns green, Peter’s shirt finally free of wrinkles. Before he accelerates, he runs a hand through the kid’s hair. “Better” Peter smiles softly.

_*Cut*_

“Oh _wow_ ” Peter looks around, people walking everywhere, lights and cables all over the place. “This is so cool Mr. Stark!”

“It’s just a set. This is nothing compared to a film or TV set.” The camera zooms on Peter’s face, his eyes and mouth wide open.

“Can we go to one of those?” The image turns, this time zooming on Tony’s annoyed face.

“Don’t push it kid.”

_*Cut*_

“Look, they are getting Mr. Stark _ready to_ _shine_!” He sing-songs. The image shows the billionaire sitting on a makeup chair, people putting different products on his face and hair while he looks at the phone. Suddenly, a close-up of Peter’s face appears.

“They didn’t want to put any makeup on me. I’m just that fabulous.” He pretends to slick his non-existent long hair.

_*Cut*_

The shot shows Mr. Stark talking to the director of the interview, both oblivious to the teenager filming them “Oh yeah, Peter will gladly answer any question you have” Peter mimics Tony’s voice. “He’s very mature.”

“That would be great! We wanted to have him here for so long! He’s so funny!” With a very fake squeaky voice, he talks over the woman talking to his mentor.

“I know, he’s just so much funnier than me. You have no clue of-“ He suddenly stops when Tony turns his head, a glare shot directly at him. “Sorry.” He whispers.

_*Cut*_

“Oh wow, that was way shorter than I expected.” Both Peter and Tony walk towards the car, getting in. The camera set on the billionaire. “So, did you like that?” Mr. Stark starts the car, his eyes on the road.

“I just got out of an interview kid, the last thing I want right now is another interview.” He sights. “But yes, it was entertaining. Much better than the boring business interviews Pepper normally makes me do.”

“Yes!” Peter shout-whispers behind the camera.

“Don’t get too excited though kid. This was a one-time thing.”

“Awwww. That’s not fair! I loved it! People will love it! We should totally do it again!” He turns the camera, now he’s the only one in the shot. “We can’t show the interview on this video, but it’ll come out soon. If you want us to do another one, once it comes out I’ll make a poll on Instagram and Twitter and you can vote.”

“Kid, that’s not how-“

“If you are a killjoy like Mr. Stark over there, you’ll vote for no more interviews. If you are fun and cool like me, you’ll vote for more. I trust you IronFam. Make the right decision.” He winks.

“Iron _what_?”

“That’s what our fans call themselves. IronFam! I think that’s cool!” Peter points the camera to the mechanic, who rolls his eyes under his sunglasses.

“Whatever kid. You and your fans are nerds.” Peter sets the camera in front of them, both in the shot.

“They are _our_ fans Mr. Stark! Not just mine.”

“Yeah yeah.”

“It’s true” He pouts “He’s skeptical.”

“I’m mature kid. Unlike you.” Peter gasps, putting his hand on his heart.

“ _Rude!_ ”

_*Cut*_

**Youtube**

**_My First Real Interview (feat. Annoyed Mr. Stark)_ **

_[_ Video attached _]_

_10.8M views_

Comments:

@IronFamFanFan

_I just love how annoyed Tony gets every time the kid opens his mouth. Such a gem._

1.2k likes 683 comments

@ParkerStarkFan

_When does the interview come out! I need more!!!! They are just precious._

834 likes 498 comments

**Twitter**

You Know Who I Am @ _TonyEStark_

_The kid keeps filming me without me approving it first. @UnderscoreParker next time you do that I’m going to sue you and take you out of my will, for real this time. You’ve been warned._

20M RT 26.7M Likes

Peter Internman _@UnderscoreParker_

_Uh, that threat doesn’t do anything for me anymore. You already said that and guess what? I’m still in your will. @PepperPotts told me._

12.1M RT 14.7M Likes

You Know Who I Am @ _TonyEStark_

_You are on thin ice kid. On thin freaking ice. And you better change that picture of me from your phone or I’ll break it to pieces, more than it already is._

8.9M RT 17.6M Likes

Peter Internman _@UnderscoreParker_

_Wow wow, I’m threatened. I feel threatened!_

8.1M RT 14.7M Likes

WIRED  _@WIRED_

_You’ve heard it here first folks! Next week. Autocomplete. @TonyEStark @UnderscoreParker_

_Get ready_

3M RT 4.9M Likes

ParkerFan _@PPFan_

_NO WAY NO WAY NO WAY. I CAN’T WAIT. WHAT THE HELL_

20k RT 30k Likes

Peter Internman _@UnderscoreParker_

_YES WAY YES WAY YES WAY._

2.1M RT 4.7M Likes

ParkerFan _@PPFan_

_I’m going to faint_

23k RT 31k Likes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the love on this story and on Undervalued! The makes me want to write more!
> 
> Don't forget to leave kudos and comments, they help a lot!


	5. Parent-Teacher Conference Embarrassment feat. Mr. Stark Pt.1 (On Our Way to School)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took me so long to update, I've had exams lately and didn't have much time to write.
> 
> As always, English is not my first language, so all mistakes are mine.

“Hello IronFam!” Tony’s sight can be heard off camera, making Peter turn his head to the driver’s seat with a smirk. He gets his face closer to the camera, whispering. “He’s still getting used to the name. Give him a few days”

“You know I can still hear you, right kid?” Peter gasps and his eyes go wide, looking at his mentor.

“ _Wow_ Mr. Stark, listening in on other people’s conversations, are we? Now that’s just rude.”

“Whatever kid”

* _Cut_ *

“So what I was about to say before Mr. ‘ _I don’t know what private conversations are_ ’ interrupted me was-“ The car suddenly stops in a red light, Tony turns his body to look at his mentee, taking his sunglasses off.

“When did the Peter Parker who wouldn’t dare to call me anything but Sir, Mr. Stark or Mr. Stark Iron Man Sir turned into this brat?” He says with a scoff.

“He grew up and realized that you are not that intimidating” Peter sing-songs.

“That I’m not that-?” He puts his sunglasses on again, turning his head and looking ahead. “Okay” He presses a button and suddenly Peter’s door opens up. “There are about 10 miles from here to your school. If you start walking you might get there before the thing starts.”

Peter sits there and looks wide-eyed between the camera and the older man who is also in the shot. “You can’t be serious-“

“I can. I’m as serious as a heart attack” The mechanic looks at him, raising an eyebrow. “Come on. Get going”

Peter blinks a few times and gets his seatbelt off, a sad look in his eyes. “Okay” He gets off the car, and closes the door, forgetting to take his camera with him.

Inside, Tony smirks and drives off slowly, following the kid’s pace. “If you walk that slow you won’t make it kid.” He yells from the driver’s seat. The shot only shows him driving and smiling widely before laughing. The car suddenly stops. “Come on kid, I was just messing with you. Get in the car.”

“ _Mr. Stark_! That’s not _funny_ -!”

* _Cut_ *

Peter is slumped on his seat, arms crossed and a frown on his face, looking out the window.

“Oh come on Underoos. You said I wasn’t intimidating. You did this yourself.” Peter doesn’t look at him, his eyes fixed on the window.

“It was just a joke Mr. Stark”

“I know it was. And what I did was a joke too.” No response comes from the kid so he just sights. “Weren’t you going to tell your adoring fans-“

“Our”

“Excuse me?”

“ _Our_ adoring fans” The mechanic opens and closes his mouth.

“Yeah, okay. _Our_ adoring fans.” He fixes his glasses with one hand, the other still on the steering wheel. “Weren’t you going to tell them what we are doing today?”

“Well now I don’t want to” Tony chuckles at the kid’s antics.

“Okay then I will.” He clears his throat before continuing. “Mr. Parker here made me pick him up from his house and take him to school. And you might be wondering, ‘ _why would you agree?_ ’ You surely have _so_ many other important things to do other than taking the kid to school. And you would be right.” The car stops once more on a red light and the billionaire relaxes on his seat. “But then again, this is not an _ordinary_ day at school. Isn’t it Pete?” He nudges the kid’s arm. “Today is a very special day. And I just found out the moment he got on the car, because this brat didn’t mention on the phone when he called me to pick him up that today is a-“ * _Nudge_ * “Parent-“ * _Nudge_ * “Teacher-“ * _Nudge_ * “Conference. Isn’t that right Pete?” He sits straight on his seat and puts both hands on the steering wheel before accelerating.

“Yeah”

“And wouldn’t it have been _nice_ to let me know what I was signing up to before making me come pick you up?”

“I guess?”

“So there you have it. That’s what we are doing today. Will it be interesting? Not at all. Does the kid want to film everything for reasons I don’t quite get? Yes. Will I embarrass him in front of his teachers and friends?-“

“No you _won’t_!” Peter finally sits straight on his seat, looking at the billionaire, pointing a finger at him. “You won’t. I only brought you here because May couldn’t make it.”

“ _Aw_ , you wound me Underoos. I thought you wanted me here, not that I was your last resource.”

“That’s not-“

“Either way, you know I will.” Peter opens his mouth to protest but Tony puts his hand up, stopping him. “You know how I am, you can’t stop me. You knew this would happen. It’s on you.” The engineer smirks and Peter goes back to his initial sitting position.

“ _Crap_ ”

* _Cut_ *

Peter walks camera in hand, his face not showing any sight of amusement. In the distance laughter can be heard. “ _Come on_ , don’t be like that!” Mr. Stark yells from far behind, walking faster to catch up with Peter.

“No, I’ll be like that. Because you are going to embarrass me in front of everyone! That’s not fair!” The kid stops, Mr. Stark finally able to catch up to him.

“That’s not fair? Kid-“ He puts his hand on his shoulder “Will you be the talk of the school for a couple of weeks? _Yes_.”

“I already am.” Peter whispers loud enough for the camera to catch and for Tony to hear.

“And has it been bad? Has people been making fun of you?” The billionaire raises an eyebrow, waiting for a response. Seeing as the kid won’t say anything he just nods. “I knew it, know why? Because spending time with me is something only 4 people can do in this world. And _somehow_ you are one of those.” He ruffles the kid’s hair. “Why do I put up with you is still a mystery to me, but here you are. I don’t think it is a bad thing. Do _you_? Because if it’s so bad for you, I’ll just stop hanging out with you at the tower and I’ll just go back to my car-“ he points behind him “and go home. Do you want that?” Peter shakes his head. “Thought so.” He puts his arm over the kid’s shoulder, making him start walking. “So let me enjoy this a bit. Meet your teachers, see your classmates’ shocked faces and make a _tiny bit_ fun of you.” Peter sights, a big smile on his face. Tony lets go of him to put his hand on the school’s front door. “Deal?”

“Deal.”

“So let’s go”

* _Cut_ *

**Youtube**

**Parent-Teacher Conference Embarrassment feat. Mr. Stark Pt.1 (On Our Way to School)**

_[_ Video attached _]_

_22.8M views_

Comments:

@StarkRavingHazelNUTs

_Dad-Tony is the only content I need to bright up my day. Thank you Mr. Parker, you are a delight._

13.2k likes 6.9k comments

@Stark4Life

_Love. Love. Love. I love their banter. The way he makes him go from a sassy brat to an annoyed brat is amazing._

18.3k likes 4.7k comments

**Twitter**

Peter Internman _@UnderscoreParker_

_I’ve seen a lot of people calling me brat lately and let me tell you that you are completely and utterly right._

22.1M RT 24.7M Likes

You Know Who I Am @ _TonyEStark_

_The question I get asked more often these days is how do I put up with the brat, my response from now on will be ‘I don’t, he’s the reason for all my nightmares’._

_30_.9M RT 57.6M Likes

Peter Internman _@UnderscoreParker_

_I’m not only the reason for those nightmares, I star in all of them. Because that’s what I am. A star._

21.1M RT 34.7M Likes

You Know Who I Am @ _TonyEStark_

_I hate the fact that I knew you would be proud of that even before I posted it._

6 _0_.5M RT 77.6M Likes

Peter Internman _@UnderscoreParker_

_Aww you know me so well Mr. Stark, you are finally learning._

27.1M RT 44.7M Likes

You Know Who I Am @ _TonyEStark_

_Brat_

13 _0_.9M RT 157.4M Likes

Happy Hogan _@StarkSecurity_

_Thank God he didn’t ask me to go._

1M RT 1.9M Likes

Peter Internman _@UnderscoreParker_

_Don’t worry Happy, you’ll have your shot next time._

7.1M RT 14.7M Likes

Happy Hogan  _@StarkSecurity_

_No no no. I’m not your father._

12k RT 1.5M Likes

You Know Who I Am @ _TonyEStark_

_I’m not either and yet there I was._

13.9M RT 17.4M Likes

Happy Hogan _@StarkSecurity_

_That’s debatable_

1.7M RT 2.5M Likes

Peter Internman _@UnderscoreParker_

_That’s debatable_

56.1M RT 64.7M Likes

PepperPotts @PepperPotts

_That’s debatable_

78M RT 89.9M Likes

You Know Who I Am @ _TonyEStark_

_Yeah, I guess that’s debatable_

133.9M RT 187.4M Likes

IronFam _@IronFamOfficial_

_BREAKING NEWS: Tony Stark accepts he’s like a father to Peter. IronDad confirmed._

200k RT 360k Likes

Peter Internman _@UnderscoreParker_

_We didn’t need his confirmation, we already knew_

12.1M RT 14.7M Likes

IronDad Wins _@IronDadFan_

_This is so wholesome._

223k RT 311k Likes

Peter Internman _@UnderscoreParker_

_Yes it is_

11.3M RT 15.5M Likes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will be the parent-teacher conference. I don't know how those work because we don't have those here, but I'll try my best.
> 
> By the way, thank you so much for your support, I'm really glad so many people enjoy my stories!
> 
> Don't forget to leave kudos and comments, they help a lot!


	6. Autocomplete Interview

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, I felt really inspired writing this chapter, so it is a long one. Enjoy it!
> 
> As always, English is not my first language, so all mistakes are mine.

“Hello I’m Parker Peter. Oops sorry! Can we do it again? I’m just really excited”

* _Cut_ *

“Hello I’m Peter Benja-“ He stops, squinting his eyes. “I don’t need to say my middle name do I?” The camera zooms on Tony, who sights and face palms. 

* _Cut_ *

“Hey I’m Peter Parker”

“And I’m Tony Stark”

“I’m pretty sure you don’t need to introduce yourself Mr. Stark. Who doesn’t know you?” The billionaire smiles, looks at the camera and Points at Peter. 

“See why I keep him around?”

* _Cut_ *

“So yeah, we are doing WIRED Autocomplete Interview. You ready Mr. Stark?”  


“As ready as I’ll ever be, I guess” Peter smiles and bounces on his stool. 

“Can you start with me please?” Tony nods and smiles. “ _Yes_!”

* _Cut_ *

“So let’s see” Peter rubs his hands, clearly excited. “Does Peter Parker go to school?” The mechanic looks directly at the camera. “You are telling me _this_ the most searched question about him? That’s so-“

“Cool! It’s cool. I do go to school and I enjoy it a lot, spending time with my friends and stuff. Shoutout to Ned and MJ!”  


“Yeah okay, let’s leave your nerdy friends aside-“  


“They are not-! Well” he rubs his chin “I guess they are”   


“Yeah, hanging out with you might even make _me_ a nerd” Mr. Stark chuckles.   


“I take no offense to that. We nerds are the best” Tony continues on, ripping the next piece of paper. 

“Speaking of nerds. Does Peter Parker like Star Wars” The kid gasps, a glint in his eyes. “Oh _here we go_ ”

“I _love_ Star Wars! It is the best franchise of all time! Oh! I made a Star Wars reference today to Mr. Stark actually. He didn’t get it though. I didn’t know why I thought he would, he hates Star Wars” Peter shrugs. 

“No no, wait. I don’t _hate_ it, I just don’t see the appeal.”

“That’s basically the same thing” He pouts.   


“Whatever kid. Let’s move on” He rips the next piece. “Does Peter Parker work with Tony Stark? That’s just a stupid question. Of course he does, you’ve seen it on his videos. Next up” Peter looks at his mentor, wide-eyed. “Does Peter Parker... have a girlfriend/boyfriend? _Oooh_ ” The man wiggles his eyebrows and crosses his arms, his full attention on Peter. “I also want to know the answer to that”

Peter just sits there completely blushed, playing with his fingers. “I don’t- I don’t have a girlfriend or a boyfriend for that matter. I-“

“But you _do_ like someone” The kid’s eyes snap to his mentor’s. 

“Mr. Stark! That’s not- I never-“ He scoffs, getting redder by the second. “That’s a really personal question that I won’t answer.” Tony chuckles.   


“That’s it?” The kid fixes his eyes on the ground and nods. “Okay then, that basically means that even though he has no girlfriend nor boyfriend, Peter here has a prototype that has a name, but he won’t tell us. Now, because _I_ know him so well, I know exactly who that person is. And it is-“ Peter suddenly stands up and puts his hand on his mentor’s mouth.   


“No no no no. You _don’t_ , I’ve never told you her name. I-“ He freezes, dropping his hand. “ _Crap_ ” The older man smiles and looks at the camera. 

“You are welcome” Peter sits back down on his stool.   


“Okay yeah, whatever I have a crush on a girl. Let’s move on” Tony laughs making Peter blush even more if that was even possible. 

* _Cut_ *

“ _Ooh_ it’s your turn now Mr. Stark.” Peter rips the first piece of paper. “Does Tony Stark have an illegitimate son?” He wiggles his eyebrows, looking at his mentor. 

“No, I don’t” Peter waits, expecting the man to say something else.   


“That’s it?” The billionaire looks at him, eyebrow raised. “That’s your whole answer?”

“What more do you want?”

“Uuh I don’t know. An explanation?” The older man takes off his sunglasses and rubs his eyes. 

“An explanation to why I _don’t_ have an illegitimate son?” Peter blinks a few times before dropping his gaze to the board on his hands. 

“I guess you are right.” He rips the next piece. “Does Tony Stark hate Captain America? _Oooh_ that’s _hard_ ” 

“It’s not-“ he sights “ I would be lying if I said I liked him. But I don’t _hate_ him. I just-“ his eyes go around the room, trying to find an answer “I just _dislike_ him”

“Huh. I guess that’s fair. Next up. Does Tony Stark hate his robots? Guys what’s up with all the hate?”

“I don’t hate my robots. They are like my children. Well more like toddlers. They can’t do anything on their own. Dumm-E is a doofus, U is kind of annoying when he wants to be and Butterfingers is well, as the name indicates, a mess.” 

  
“But he loves them all the same.” Peter smiles at his mentor. “He won’t let me touch them. It’s like they are antiquities on a museum.”

  
“Everything you touch seems to break recently kid. I made Dumm-E in college when I was around 20, if you break him, you’ll build me a new one.”

  
“I’d rather not.”

  
“Thought so. Next!”

  
“Does Tony Stark have superpowers? Uhh, he’s Iron Man, what superpowers would he need?”

“Thanks kid.” He chuckles “No, unlike every other superhero out there, excluding two I can think of, I don’t have any kind of superpower. I don’t really need it though, technology can achieve so much more, I think. Technology evolves, superpowers? Not so much.” He shrugs.

“Well, you do have one superpower.” Tony raises an eyebrow, looking at Peter. “Yeah, you are a super genius, that’s a superpower for sure.”

“My ego is going off the roof with you today kid.”

* _Cut_ *

“Oooh I’m up again”

“Is Peter Parker Tony Stark’s son?” The billionaire sights. “For God’s sake. I don’t have kids!” Peter laughs at his mentor’s desperation.   


“He’s right. The closest thing to a father Mr. Stark has been to me is when he’s given me lectures about being late to school or not cleaning up after myself.”

“Something you seem to keep doing even _after_ all those lectures.” Tony raises a brow while Peter puffs his chest, ready for a comeback.   


“That means you are not doing a great job.” Tony opens and closes his mouth, a big smirk plastered on Peter’s face.   


“ _Brat_ ” He tears the next piece. ”Is Peter Parker friends with Spider-man?” The kid bounces in his seat, fidgeting.   


“I don’t think I’m supposed to say it.” Tony looks at him, not knowing what the kid will say next. “I’ve met him several times. And he’s the coolest dude there is. Let me tell you. He just-“ Tony stops him, not wanting a rant. 

“Yeah yeah, we all know how cool Spidey is kid, we don’t need a whole speech about it”

“Sorry” He smiles slightly. 

“Is Peter Parker a brat?” The kid’s eyes open widely, looking at his mentor. The older man just laughs. “Nah, I’m kidding, it doesn’t say that.” He removes the paper with the actual question. “But it _is_ an interesting question-“

“Mr. Stark!” The man chuckles.

“Okay, okay. _Jeez_. Is Peter Parker a genius?”

“Uhh I don’t think so? Like, I’m really smart, but I’m not sure to what extent. I’ve never been tested or anything, but I for one, wouldn’t consider myself a genius-”

“Of course _you_ wouldn’t. You are _you_. But me being me, I can tell you and everyone watching that yes, this kid is a genius. He wouldn’t be working with me if he wasn’t.” He pats the kids back.

“So you only want me for my brain?” He gasps “I thought you _liked_ me Mr. Stark! I feel betrayed.” The man drops his hand, leaving the board on the ground next to him.

“Be thankful you are smart kid, if I had to keep you because of your attitude, you wouldn’t be sitting here right now.”

“ _Rude_ ”

* _Cut_ *

“And this is the last board” Peter shows it to the camera. “Okay Mr. Stark. Last questions. Is Tony Stark-“

“If that thing says ‘Is Tony Stark a dad’ I’m throwing that board out a window.” Peter rips the paper a bit, not showing what it says. He laughs and glues it back on.   


“We better move on from that one” he giggles, Tonys just rolls his eyes. “Okaaay. Next up. Is Tony Stark a bad guy?” Peter gasps. “A _bad_ _guy_? Seriously? Tony Stark, _Iron Man_ a bad guy?” He scoffs. “This question is just stupid.” He goes to rip out the next one but stops himself before he does. “Iron Man is not only the best superhero there is, but Mr. Stark is the best and smartest engineer ever. So no, he is not a bad guy.” He scoffs again, not noticing his mentor’s wide-eyed face. 

“I like you more every day kid.” He puts an arm around his shoulders, giving him a slight hug, making the kid blush.   


“Sorry, I just got carried away.” Mr. Stark doesn’t answer, instead he just ruffles Peter’s hair. “Let’s just move on to the last question. Is Tony Stark really in love with Pepper Potts?”

  
“Uh, _excuse yo_ u? Of course I am. She’s _Pepper Potts_. Have you seen her? How can I not be in love with that woman? The day we get married I will be nothing but her trophy husband. And I will be okay with it.”

  
“Aww Mr. Stark. See? I knew you were a softie.”

  
“Okay. So that was it”

  
“No but wait!” His mentor focuses his attention on him. “We haven’t finished yet!” The billionaire raises an eyebrow. “Yeah! The _most_ important question of them all!” He rips the last piece of paper. “Is Tony Stark a _dad_?” He laughs at the older man’s expression and tries to dodge the smack he throws his way. “ _Now_ we are done”

  
“What did I do to deserve this?”

* _Cut_ *

The camera shakes indicating that the interview is over but somehow it’s still rolling. Peter and Tony both stand up, the older man putting his arm around the kid’s shoulders. 

  
“That was _so_ cool Mr. Stark!” Peter’s smile goes from ear to ear, making the billionaire smile in return. 

  
“Yeah, I guess it was.” 

  
“Oh oh oh! I can film now with my camera right?” The man nods “Great! Just wait here Mr. Stark. _Don’t_ move” The kid giggles running away from the shot. Tony takes out his phone dialing a number and putting it on his ear. 

  
“Hey Pep... Yeah, it was okay... Yeah yeah, I’ll bring the kid home safe... He’s my kid what were you expecting?” He chuckles “Yeah I know, I’ll feed him on the way to his aunt’s... Okay, love you too. Bye.” He hangs up. 

  
“ _Mr_. _Staaaaark_!” The billionaire rolls his eyes, the smile never leaving her face. 

“Here we go again” He whispers “Yeah I’m coming! Don’t do anything stupid!” A loud crack is heard in the distance. The man sights, runs a hand through his hair and starts walking, mumbling to himself. “Why did I say anything? It’s Peter, _of course_ he would do something stupid-

* _Cut_ *

**Youtube**

**Tony Stark and Peter Parker Answer the Web’s Most Searched Questions | WIRED**

_[_ Video attached _]_

_42.5M views_

Comments:

@TeamIronDad

_It’s finally here! The banter, the fatherly love Tony has for Peter and the witty remarks make everything even better._

123.2k likes 69.9k comments

@ParkerStark

_They are just the cutest father-son duo there is._

58.3k likes 43.7k comments

**Twitter**

WIRED  _@WIRED_

_The interview is finally out! Check our Youtube to see @TonyEStark and @UnderscoreParker in all their witty glory._

3M RT 4.9M Likes

Peter Internman _@UnderscoreParker_

_Aaaah the interview is out! I had such a blast doing this, it was great. Can we do it again @TonyEStark?_

32.1M RT 44.7M Likes

You Know Who I A m @ _TonyEStark_

_I don’t know kid, doing more interviews with you might not be the best for my image, making me look all soft._

60.9M RT 87.6M Likes

Peter Internman _@UnderscoreParker_

_Not soft. Fatherly Mr. Stark. Admit it_

71.1M RT 84.7M Likes

You Know Who I Am @ _TonyEStark_

_Shut up_

70.5M RT 77.6M Likes

IronFam _@IronFamOfficial_

_The WIRED Autocomplete interview is out! [Attached Link]_

260k RT 560k Likes

IronDad Wins _@IronDadFan_

_Omg. It was amazing! Did anyone else notice how Tony called Peter ‘my kid’ when he was talking to Pepper? So cute!_

223k RT 311k Likes

Peter Internman _@UnderscoreParker_

_@TonyEStark You’re my dad! Boogie Woogie Boogie!_

131.3M RT 155.5M Likes

You Know Who I Am @ _TonyEStark_

_What the hell are you talking about kid?_

80.5M RT 97.6M Likes

Peter Internman _@UnderscoreParker_

_Why do I even try?_

35.3M RT 45.5M Likes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't forget to leave kudos and comments, the help a lot!


	7. Parent-Teacher Conference Embarrassment feat. Mr. Stark Pt.2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, English is not my first language, so all mistakes are mine.

“So, how’s the kid been doing in your class? Great I assume. Right Pete?” The teen sets the camera on top of the table focusing on them, after asking for permission from the teacher. The billionaire pats the kid’s back, a smirk on his face.

“Well-“ The teacher clears his throat. “He’s been doing really good-“

“Of course he is.”

“But-“ The smirk from Tony’s face disappears, replaced with surprise.

“But?”

“But- he’s been, uh… how do I say this… slacking off?” The genius turns his head to look at Peter, brow raised. The kid in question doesn’t look up at first, his eyes fixed on his fidgeting hands, finally looking at his mentor after a few seconds of silence.

“Well?” Peter looks between his teacher and his father-figure, trying to come up with something to say.

“I- uh- I haven’t been… sleeping well?” He gives them a fake smile, making Tony roll his eyes.

“I don’t buy that kid. What’s going on?” Peter looks at him, pleading him to let it go.

“It’s nothing.” Seeing as the man doesn’t drop it, he turns his head to continue looking at his hands. “It’s- it’s personal.”

“It’s personal and you wanted to film all of it?” The mechanic points at the camera, not taking his eyes off of Peter. “Come on kid, it can’t be that bad.”

“I can promise you Peter that whatever you say won’t get out of this room-“

“Unless you decide to post it online, of course.” Tony interjects.

“Yes, if you don’t do that.” It takes a while but Peter finally has the courage to look up and tell the truth.

“It’s uh- The class is- The class is too easy. So I- I don’t pay attention.” His voice lowers after each word. When he finishes, the room falls silent until the teacher clears his throat behind the camera.

“Uh… That’s not what I was… expecting?” Tony relaxes in his seat, dropping his arm over the kid’s back, trying to hold his laughter. “I mean, I can’t put you on a higher class because, well… this one is the highest on your grade so you would have to skip-“

“No no no. He’s not skipping anything.” Tony puts one leg over another, getting more comfortable.

“I was just saying that-“ He doesn’t let him finish, putting one hand up, signaling him to stop.

“I know what you mean. But I’m telling you now. He’s not skipping any grades. Not now. Not ever.” Peter looks at the older man, brow raised.

“Why not Mr. Stark? Not that I would want to do that. Because all my friends are in my grade-“

“You mean, your _two_ friends.”

“ _Yes_ Mr. Stark. My _two_ friends.” He rolls his eyes. “But either way. Why wouldn’t you let me?” The man sights

“It’s not that I wouldn’t _let_ you - not that I have any power to forbid you from doing that - it’s just that I know what it’s like. And let me tell you kid.” He looks directly at Peter’s eyes. “It’s no fun. No fun at all.” He sits back on his chair, talking to the teacher now. “So no, he won’t be skipping any grades. Just get him some advanced equations or something.”

“This is biology Mr. Stark.”

“Whatever. Just give him advanced whatever you teach. Okay?” The billionaire extends his arm to the man, who shakes it. Quickly, Tony stands up. “Okay well, let’s keep going kid.” He starts walking to the door, waiting for the kid to grab the camera and say goodbye to his teacher. Once he does, Peter speed-walks to his mentor.

“I told you you were a genius kid. But surprise! You never listen to me.” Wrapping an arm over the kid’s shoulder, the duo walk to the next meeting.

_*Cut*_

“Ned! MJ!” Peter sprints to join his friends, the camera shaking the whole way there. “Hey guys! Say hi to everyone! This is going to be the first time you will be on one of our videos!” He points the camera to them, Ned grinning and waving, notably excited. MJ on the other hand, just crosses her arms and glares at the camera. 

“Am I really going to be on one of your stupid videos?” A gasp can be heard behind the camera, clearly Peter’s. “Have you asked me before if I want to be in it? What if I don’t want people to know who I am?” No one says anything for a while, Ned looking at her wide-eyed.

“I- I didn’t think about that. I’m sorry! I’ll just pixel your face so they won’t recognize you. Or I don’t put this on the video at all! I’m sorry-“ A small smile appears on MJ’s face, making Peter stop rambling.

“I was just kidding nerds. I don’t care if people know what I look like or who I am.” She turns around and walks away, not before saying goodbye. “Losers” Ned waves her goodbye, Peter just turns the camera towards his face, for clarification.

“She calls us losers, but with affection.”

“Yeah! She still loves us.” Peter looks at Ned, eyebrow raised. “Well… tolerate us.”

“Yep, that sounds about right.” He grins at the camera.

_*Cut*_

“It’s in his nature, he grabs things he is not supposed to grab and makes a mess with it.” Peter sits stumped in his chair, Mr. Stark talking to his chemistry teacher. “He once grabbed this jar of something chemical, I can’t remember what now, but _dangerous_. And I told him beforehand that he wasn’t allowed to touch it. Under _any circumstances,_ and what does Peter here do?” He pats his back. “The moment I leave the lab. The _moment_ I step away from it, he runs all the way to the table where the chemical was and he decides, over _everything_ that he could’ve thought to do, to taste it. _Taste it_. I don’t need to tell you how it ended.” The teacher chuckles behind camera, making Peter blush, encouraging the billionaire to continue. “Well you know what? I’m going to tell you anyways.” He sat more relaxed in his chair. “He had diarrhea for three days straight-“

“Mr. Stark! Don’t go telling that to everybody!” He sits straight suddenly, trying to stop him from telling everyone.

“Everybody? This is just your teacher-“ Peter points to the camera. “Oh well, then don’t put this on the video.” He turns his attention to the teacher. “As I was saying-“

* _Cut*_

_“_ Well, that was productive wasn’t it?” Both mentor and mentee walk slowly to the entrance of the school. Peter holds the camera with one of his hands, pointing it towards both of them. From behind, someone comes running in their direction.

“It might’ve been, if you hadn’t told personal and embarrassing stories about me to my teachers! They see me everyday Mr. Stark! This-“

“Mr. Stark, sir. Uuuh, hey Peter.” Suddenly, next to him appears none other than Flash Thompson. “It’s an honor to meet you Mr. Stark, I’m a huge fan of yours.” He extends his arm “I’m Flash.” Tony takes it, shaking it.

“Well, it’s nice to finally meet you Mr. Thompson.” Flash’s eyes begin to sparkle, mouth wide-open.

“You know who I am?” Tony just chuckles.

“Yeah kid. I know who you are.” He wraps an arm around Peter. “Pete here has told me _all_ about you.” He gives his mentee a fake smile. “Haven’t you Pete?” He just nods, not knowing what to say to get out of this situation.

“All good things I hope.” He shoots a glare to Peter, who doesn’t even look his way.

“Well, some of them. If we exclude the bully part, I think you would be good at… something or the other.” He gives Flash one of his best fake smiles, patting Peter on his shoulder to make him start walking, leaving Flash completely shocked.

“I think you got the wrong Flash!” He yells as a last resort.

“Yeah, because there are _so many_ kids with that nickname around here.” He whispers to his kid, who just stares at the camera.

_*Cut*_

“Well, it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be.” The billionaire starts the car, putting his sunglasses back in place. “It was fun meeting all your teachers, your friends and bullies. It was nice.” Peter doesn’t say anything, just looks at the man, waiting for the moment he’s sure it’s coming. “Next time I won’t be as nice though.” _There it is_ “I’m serious.” He looks at the camera, pointing a finger at it. “I know you are watching this _Flash_. If you so as look at him the wrong way, I’ll Iron Man your ass-“

* _Cut_ *

**Youtube**

**Parent-Teacher Conference Embarrassment feat. Mr. Stark Pt.2**

_[_ Video attached _]_

_45.9M views_

**Twitter**

You Know Who I A m @ _TonyEStark_

_You cut the best part of my story and my lecture kid. If you keep editing stuff like this, I will have to personally edit these videos myself. You don’t get to cut my words @UnderscoreParker_

40.9M RT 57.6M Likes

Peter Internman _@UnderscoreParker_

_You were too embarrassing Mr. Stark. I can’t have people thinking weird things about me. I need a rep, you know?_

32.3M RT 40.7M Likes

You Know Who I A m @ _TonyEStark_

_What rep kid? You were born like yesterday._

50.4M RT 77.6M Likes

Peter Internman _@UnderscoreParker_

_I wasn’t born yesterday! I was born 15 years ago. Get your math right._

31.1M RT 44.7M Likes

You Know Who I Am @ _TonyEStark_

_Oh I’m sorry, does the kiddie feel old now?_

60.5M RT 77.9M Likes

Peter Internman @UnderscoreParker

_I quit_

51.4M RT 64.7M Likes

You Know Who I Am @ _TonyEStark_

_You wouldn’t_

50.5M RT 67.9M Likes

Peter Internman @UnderscoreParker

_Try me bitch_

65.1M RT 68.7M Likes

You Know Who I Am @ _TonyEStark_

_Yeah, that’s it. I’m taking your internet away_

53.5M RT 57.2M Likes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't forget to leave kudos and comments, they help a lot!


	8. Pun Fun With Tony Stark Pt. 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, English is not my first language, so all mistakes are mine.

“The time has come. _Again_.” The camera zooms in on Peter’s smirking face. “It’s been a while.” He puts the camera on the lab table and jumps on the couch, laying on his side, facing the audience. “You know what time it is. Pun time!” He rolls on his back and throws his arms out.Suddenly, he jumps up and grabs the camera again. “Let’s do this.”

* _Cut*_

Peter sits on the couch, phone in hand. From behind, Tony walks to the kitchen and pours some coffee.

“Do you want a muffin kid?” The teen turns around and nods.

“Yes please!” The mechanic grabs one from the counter and starts walking towards the kid.

“What are you doing kiddo?” Peter turns his head, a smile on his face.

“Nothing Mr. Stark. Just looking to see if there are any concerts I could go to with Ned and MJ.” The genius rests his elbows on the back of the couch, looking at Peter’s screen.

“Did you find anything?”

“Not really, the only thing I found was a _really_ cheap one.” He turns to look at his mentor and shows him the price.

“What kind of concert only costs 45 cents?” The older man frowns, standing straight to try grabbing the phone and look at it closely.

“A 50 Cent concert featuring Nickelback, of course.” Tony’s hand stops mere centimeters away from the device and glares at the kid, who is trying as hard as he can to hold his laughter.

“I can’t believe I fell for that.” Without another word, Mr. Stark turns around, leaving the teen laughing his ass off on the couch.

“Mr. Stark come back! I still want the muffin!”

“You go get it yourself, brat!”

* _Cut_ *

“Excuse me, Ms. Potts?” The woman looks up from her computer, seeing the teen walk up to her desk slowly.

“Hello, Peter. I told you a million times to just call me Pepper.” She gives him a small smile, focusing her attention oh him. “What do you need?” The teen sits on one of the chairs, leaving the camera on the desk, both of them on the shot.

“Uhm… I just wanted to ask you if you could help me on one of my videos.”

“Oh, yeah. Sure! What do you need?” Brows raised, Peter opens his mouth, no sounds coming out of it.

“Sorry, sorry. I didn’t actually think you would help me.” Pepper chuckles and relaxes on her chair.

“Do I get to annoy Tony?” Peter smirks, letting her know immediately that she was right. “Then I’m in.”

* _Cut_ *

The camera is set on one of the counters, catching Tony and Pepper talking on the kitchen island.

“Don’t you get it?” Tony is sitting on one of the kitchen stools, frowning. Pepper is standing on the other side of the island, giving Peter a knowing look the moment she sees him enter.

“I’m sorry honey, I don’t- I really don’t get it.” She sights and drops her head.

“Really?”

“Really! I still don’t get how that joke was funny. I don’t get how the apple could do that. It makes no sense.” Peter gasps on the background, making Tony turn around.

“You didn’t get it Mr. Stark?” He walks to Pepper, standing just next to her.

“What are you talking about kid, you weren’t even here.” He runs a hand through his hair.

“I heard part of the joke when I was walking here. And let me tell you Ms. Potts, it was hilarious.” Pepper smiles, putting her arm over the kid’s shoulder.

“See, Tony. Peter understands humor.” The genius throws his arms up and scoffs.

“Whatever.” He stands up grabbing his mug.

“Ms. Pepper, if he can’t appreciate your fruit jokes, you need to let that _mango_.” Tony stands still, turning his whole body slowly to glare at them.

“What the fu-!”

* _Cut_ *

“Mr. Stark, you wouldn’t believe what happened to me last Saturday at this party I went to-“ The genius, who didn’t even look away from his work when Peter started talking, suddenly looked up the moment the word ‘ _party_ ’ came out of the kid’s mouth.

“A _party_?” Tony relaxed on his chair and spun around. “ _You_ , at a _party_?” He chuckled “Yeah, sure.” Peter gasped, trying to save the situation.

“What-? I was at a party!” The older man nods, a knowing smile on his face.

“Yeah, yeah. Keep telling yourself that kid.” Peter crosses his arms, pretending to be hurt. “The closest you’ve been to a ‘party’“ air quotes “was that time we were eating a burger and the table nearest to ours was throwing a birthday party for a 5-year-old.” He laughs and spins back around.

“That’s not fair, Mr. Stark.” He takes a couple of seconds to come up with something that would make his mentor believe his lie. “It was a party that Ned’s family was throwing with some of their friends. Ned invited me-“

“I don’t really care what the party was about kid. Just tell me what you were going to tell me. Even though I’ve got a feeling I know where this is going.” Shock is clear on Peter’s face, but the show must go on, right?

“Well, anyway. I was at Ned’s family’s party and I lost my watch somewhere. When I went looking for it, I saw some guy stepping on it while harassing a girl-“

“What kind of family party was that?” The billionaire grabs a screwdriver and keeps going with his work. “Harassing-?”

“Would you let me finish, Mr. Stark?” The kid gives him a glare and he just shrugs. “Okay. As I was saying before you rudely interrupted me, I saw a guy stepping on it while harassing a girl. So I walked up to the dude and punched him straight in the nose because no one does that to a girl-“

“If that was me and Pepper, _she_ would punch _me_ if I did that.” He looks up when the kid doesn’t respond. “Trust me, I’m talking from experience. She can defend herself.” He turns back to his work and Peter grunts, annoyed at the interruption. “But please, continue.”

“As I was saying. No one punches a girl-“

“Not on my watch.” The kid opens and closes his mouth, not believing Tony was able to get it so quickly. “I knew what the pun was the moment you started kiddo.” He chuckled.

“What-?”

“I can also look up puns online Pete.”

“But-“

“I found out that you take all your puns from the same page, so it was pretty easy to memorize the rest.” He puts down the screwdriver and reclines on his chair, smirking at Peter’s shocked face. “Did I spend 10 minutes of my life memorizing stupid puns? Yes. Am I glad I did it? Not really, but if it keeps me from hearing any more God-awful puns from you for a while, I’m more than happy.” The teen just stares at him, not saying anything at all. “All is fair in love and war kid.”

“But- but-“ The billionaire gets up from his chair and gets his face closer to the camera.

“Tony 1, Peter 0.” He ruffles the kid’s hair and walks away. “Close your mouth kid, or you’ll catch flies!” His laughter can be heard all the way from the lab.

“Yeah.” He focuses the camera on his face. “I think I’m done for today.”

* _Cut_ *

**Youtube**

**Pun Fun with Mr. Stark Pt.2**

_[_ Video attached _]_

_55.8M views_

**Twitter**

You Know Who I A m @ _TonyEStark_

_Here’s to hoping I won’t hear any more stupid puns from @UnderscoreParker_

35.9M RT 47.6M Likes

Peter Internman _@UnderscoreParker_

_I have to strategize again. It might take a while, but I’ll be back @TonyEStark, you won’t get rid of me and my puns so easily._

32.4M RT 43.7M Likes

You Know Who I A m @ _TonyEStark_

_And I’ll be waiting kid. More prepared than ever._

46.4M RT 57.6M Likes

Peter Internman _@UnderscoreParker_

_Damn_

45.1M RT 54.7M Likes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for more than 3.000 hits and so many kudos! It means the world to me.
> 
> Don't forget to leave kudos and comments, they help a lot.


	9. I’ve Been Lied To For Years (Not Click-bate)

“I can’t believe this” The camera is on the Tower’s kitchen counter, filming Peter walking back and forth. “I literally can’t believe this!” Fuming, he walks towards it, lays both his hands oh either side of the camera and gets his whole face on the shot. “He betrayed me! He looked me in the eyes for years and he just lied to me!” He closes his eyes and tries to relax. “Calm down Peter, calm down.” He exhales and inhales a couple of times and opens his eyes. “You know what?” He grabs the camera roughly and starts marching to the elevator. “I’m NOT going to calm down because this is unbelievable-!”

_*Cut*_

“Kid, what’s wrong?” The image is completely blurry due to the fact that Peter doesn’t even try to stop moving.

“What’s wrong?!” Finally, he stops and puts the camera on one of the tables, both of them barely on the shot. As the lenses focus on the only two people on the room, it’s finally clear to see who they are. On the left, with messed up hair, some sweatpants and a Stark hoodie is Peter, staring angrily at who is best known as ‘forehead of security’ aka Happy.

“Yeah kid, what’s wrong? Did something happen? Is someone hurt? What-?” Peter extends one hand right in front of his face, making him stop talking immediately.

“What’s wrong, you ask? What’s wrong is that you’ve been lying to me!” Not knowing what the kid was talking about, Happy backtracks, frowning.

“Lying to you? What do you-? What are you talking about?”

“Don’t lie to me _Happy_ -“ he says with disdain “-you know EXACTLY what you’ve been lying to me about.” For a while no one speaks, Peter blazing holes with his eyes and Happy visibly sweating and trying to find out what the kid was babbling about. After what felt like hours, the older man pales.

“Listen Peter-“ He takes a step forward “- we didn’t tell you because we thought it was too soon. We wanted to be sure it was going to work out before we said anything.” And another “I’m sorry you had to find out like this, we were planning on telling you soon. Actually, we were going to have dinner next week at your apartment-“ Completely confused, Peter waves a hand, signaling for Happy to stop talking.

“Wait wait wait wait. We? Who’s we?” Happy just frowns in response. “What are you talking about?”

“May and I.”

“May and- What? May knows about this too?!” Happy just opens and closes his mouth, not knowing what to say.

“What- Of course she knows about this, Peter!” The kid just gasps.

“She knew about this before I did? And she didn’t tell me?!”

“What the hell are you talking about Peter?”

“What are _you_ talking about?” Both just stare at each other for a couple of seconds.

“About us dating. What-?” Peter’s eyebrows shoot to the sky.

“WHAT? Dating?! What are you-?” Feeling like a switch just turned on, he stops and his eyes slowly go up until they meet his. “You-“ He takes a step forward “-are-“ another “-dating-“ he stops right in front of him, points a finger and nudges the older man’s chest with it “-my AUNT?!” Frozen on the spot, Happy’s eyes open up completely, knowing he just fucked up.

“What- Isn’t that- Isn’t that what you were accusing me of?” He replies barely above a whisper.

“No! That was not it! This is way worse!” Needing to sit down, Happy grabs the nearest chair and plops down, his face on both his hands. “How long has this been going on without me knowing?” Without looking up, the older man mumbles a response too low for the camera to catch but just loud enough for Peter to hear.

“A YEAR?! What do you mean a year?!” The kid starts pacing again, back and forth. “This is unbelievable. It’s the icing on the cake.”

“Well I didn’t know what you were going on _and_ _on_ about! You just kept being angry at me but didn’t say what for! Me dating May was the only thing I kept from you so I don’t know what the hell you were so mad about on the first place!”

“Oh well I don’t know _Harold_ , you tell me _.”_ Peter stops right next to him, not saying anything else. The older man starts to raise his head from his hands, mouth agape, frowning and glaring at the kid. Suddenly he stands up.

“That’s what had you so riled up?! My name being Harold and not Happy?!” Peter nods, anger still visible on his face, but not as much as on Happy’s. “What the hell is wrong with you kid?” He grabs his suit jacket and starts walking to the door.

“Where are you going?!” Peter turns around, trying to stop him.

“To get some air and away from you. If I spend any more time with you I might get an _ulcer_.” The door slams shut.

_*Cut*_

“Hey hey hey, what’s wrong kid?” Peter puts down the camera roughly once again, this time on his table on Mr. Stark’s lab.

“Just a bad day Mr. Stark.” The only one on the shot is Peter, that is until Tony comes rolling in on his lab chair, stopping next to the kid and laying a hand on the back of Peter’s chair.

“Then tell me about it.” He lays his head on one of his hands, the other scribbling some formula on a piece of paper. “Come on.” The kid sights but agrees.

“Okay.” He sits straight, turning his chair so he can face his mentor. “So I just found out Happy is dating my aunt-“

“He finally told you about it?” Glaring at him, he sights.

“You knew too?”

“Everyone knew about it sweetie.” Pepper says as she walks through the door carrying some papers for Tony to sign. When she reaches her boyfriend’s chair, she lays a hand on the back of his head and runs it through the hair, making Tony smile. “You need to sign these.” The papers fall on his lap at the same time that his smile falls from his face. 

“Okay so everyone knew except me. That’s great.” He crosses his arms and sights.

“But is it _that_ bad?” Mr. Stark asks as he signs the papers. “It’s Happy after all. You know him-“ Peter scoffs.

“Yeah right.” Pepper frowns, Tony looks up for a moment but then looks down and keeps going with his work.

“What do you mean Peter?”

“That _that_ was not the only thing he was lying to me about! His name’s not Happy! It’s _Harold_.” Tony stops signing abruptly, raising his head slowly, first looking at Pepper and then at the kid. “What?”

“Well-“ Pepper starts but gets interrupted by Tony.

“Kiddo, you know that Pepper-“ Peter gasps, feeling as if yet another switch turned on in his head.

“ _No_. No no no no. Not you _too_ Ms. Potts!”

“Peter come on, is not that big of a deal-“

“It is a big deal. It’s like you can’t even tell me your real name! Do you not trust me that much?!” Pepper leaves Tony’s side and lays a hand on Peter’s shoulder.

“It’s not that, sweetie -” Peter sights.

“If your name’s not Pepper, then what is it?”

“Virginia.” He doesn’t respond, he just stands up leaving the camera behind and walking away.

“Kid, what-?!”

“I’ve been lied to for years!” Neither Tony nor Pepper move for a while until the genius bursts out laughing, followed shortly after by Pepper.

“He’s such a drama queen.” The billionaire says after he’s calmed down. Pepper just nods and sits down on her boyfriend’s lap, reading through the papers he just signed. “May’s raised him right.” Her attention shifts over to Tony, smiling.

“You know you are a big part of that right?” He frowns “The _raising_ part?”

“I don’t-“ She glares at him and he just sights, admitting his defeat. “Yeah, okay. I guess you are _technically_ right.” She keeps glaring at him. “Okay! You _are_ right.” Pepper smiles and leans over to kiss him, stopped by Tony as he glares at the camera. “ _Shit_ ”

“What-“ Tony leans over the table to grab it, filming only his face.

“I swear to God kid, if you put this on your video-“ Pepper can be heard laughing behind the camera “It’s not funny Pepper!“ Instead of replying, she grabs the camera from Tony’s hands and films herself.

“Don’t listen to your dad Peter” She winks knowingly.

“What do you mean don’t listen to me?! He has to listen to me! He-“ The camera turns just in time to catch his face. “Wait- did you- Did you just say _dad_?”

_*Cut*_

**Youtube**

**I’ve Been Lied To For Years (Not Click-bate)**

_[_ Video attached _]_

_87.4M views_

@TeamIronDad

_Am I the only one who was hoping that what he had been lied to about was him being Tony’s son biologically? No? Okay_

193.2k likes 59.9k comments

@ParkerStark

_I love how frustrated he gets over nothing <3 AND PEPPER CALLED TONY PETER’S DAD_

88.3k likes 63.7k comments

**Twitter**

IronFam _@IronFamOfficial_

_BREAKING NEWS: Happy (head of security) is dating May (Peter’s aunt) [Plot twist]_

60k RT 90k Likes

IronFam _@IronFamOfficial_

_BREAKING NEWS: Pepper just called Tony Peter’s dad and he admitted it (for a couple of seconds)_

260k RT 390k Likes

You Know Who I A m @ _TonyEStark_

_Can’t believe that I have to go on record AGAIN to remind everyone that @UnderscoreParker is in fact NOT my son._

4 5.9M RT 77.6M Likes

Peter Internman _@UnderscoreParker_

_*Biologically. You are not my dad biologically_

62.4M RT 73.7M Likes

You Know Who I A m @ _TonyEStark_

_Shut up_

66.4M RT 87.6M Likes


	10. Keeping Up With The Avengers (Episode I: Interviews)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh hello, I'm here again. Long time no see, right? It's been crazy, let me tell you. Everything's crazy, so my inspiration rarely comes these days. But today it's our lucky day, because inspiration finally struck, at least for a bit. So here you have it. Hope you enjoy it.
> 
> As always, English is not my first language, so all mistakes are mine.

“Guys. Guys. Guys. There’s no way. _No way_.” Peter is sitting down on the floor, looking at his phone like a maniac. “Ms. Potts likes my idea! _The_ Ms. Potts likes my idea!” Grinning widely, he runs one of his hands through his hair. “I’m shoo-“ Suddenly, his mouth hangs open, moving his hand from his hair to his face, starting to laugh almost manically. “Holy sh*t! _Holy sh*t!_ ” His phone drops to the ground but he doesn’t seem to care, almost too happy to notice. “They are doing it! Ms. Potts liked my idea and they are _actually_ going to do it!” Frantically, he grabs his camera and films a close-up of his smiling face. “You can send your ‘thank yous’ and words of adoration through twitter, because it’s finally happening. _”_ He puts his camera on the ground and lays down before it, stretching. “Holy sh*t, this is real.”

_*Cut*_

_“_ No, no, no. Pep. You can’t be serious right now.” Tony follows Pepper like a lost puppy, needing to catch her attention. “It’s one thing for the kid to film some shenanigans with me when I let him do it. But _this_? This is an invasion of privacy is what it is!” His girlfriend stops in her tracks and turns around, a soft smile on her face.

“Tony” Her hands cup his face “It’s not that big of a deal”

“But it _is_ , honey. I don’t want to have cameras filming me 24/7 and then uploading the footage online.” He says in a lower voice. The CEO just smiles and gives him a small peck on the lips.

“Don’t overthink it, just do what you always do.” The genius sights and looks down.

“There are no cameras on our bedroom, right?” Pepper laughs, her cheeks turning a soft red.

“Of course not dumbass. There are no cameras either on our bedrooms nor bathrooms. We want good PR, not lawsuits.” Before she leaves, she kisses him again, this time a little longer. “Be good” The billionaire just nods, watching her go through the door. He stays in the same position for a couple of seconds before turning around and looking straight to one of the new cameras on the celling. The image zooms in on Tony’s frowned face.

“You are _so_ going to pay for this kid. Just you wait.” That being said, he storms out of the room, leaving it completely empty.

_*Cut*_

The image shows a simple illuminated chair, nothing else. Suddenly Peter appears on screen, sitting down on that same chair, grinning.

“So, here’s how this is going to go. Our ‘ _guests_ ’” He quotes with his fingers “Will sit here. _I_ will be on the other side of the camera asking questions. The catch?” He gets closer to the camera and smiles like a maniac “The rest of the Avengers are back. They’ve made peace with the world, and most importantly, with Mr. Stark. Ever wondered how it’s like to live with the Avengers? ‘ _Do they get along perfectly?’ ‘Do they fight?’ ‘Do they try to kill each other every single time they see their faces?’_ Well, my friends, this masterpiece is going to be the answer to _all_ your questions.”

Before he can continue, a loud crash rumbles from the floor above, making the kid jump. A couple of seconds pass in silence right before a shout - undoubtedly Mr. Stark’s - is heard.

“ _Clint I swear to anything that’s holy that I’m kicking you out of this tower if you don’t pick that right up!_ ”

The kid lets out a quiet laugh before relaxing on the chair, both his hands interlinked, one leg over the other, and with his best documentary-like voice, he finishes “Well, buckle up kids, because _this_ is ‘Keeping up with The Avengers’”

_*Cut*_

**TONY**

The camera shakes slightly, Peter trying to set it in place. Mr. Stark suddenly appears on screen, settling in on the rather comfy-looking chair. He takes off his sunglasses, showing his unimpressed look. As he looks around the room, a sight can be heard coming from the older man’s mouth. Not bother by it, Peter clears his throat behind the camera, the image finally still.

“You ready to begin Mr. Stark?” The man lets out a soft laugh, no happiness behind it.

“As ready as I’ll ever be, kid”

* _Cut_ *

“Do you regret letting all the Avengers live in your tower?” Tony just glares at the kid, right behind the camera. “Uhhm, I’m uh- I’m taking that as a yes?”

“ _Yes_. Of course _yes_. I regret my decision every _second_ of my existence.” He scoffs. “I’m nice to someone for once in my life and _this_ is what I get. Stupidity 24/7. This is _exactly_ why I’m not nice to people.”

“Well, you agreed to do this reality and these personal interviews, so there’s that, right?”

“Oh, no, no, no, no. Don’t get confused here kid. I’m only doing this because if I didn’t, I’d be dead. Pepper would’ve killed me and hid the body. No one would’ve been able to find me. That’s the difference. _That_ is the big difference. Don’t get it twisted.”

* _Cut_ *

**CLINT**

“Oooh this chair’s really comfy!” Clint exclaims as he sits down.

“Yeah! I picked it out because it’s Mr. Stark’s favorite chair. He sits in there hours and hours building stuff. He _loves_ it. He would rather be doing other stuff than this reality show, I’m sure. Well… he actually told me he didn’t want to do this, so that’s why I’m going to try and make him as comfortable as possible. I hope it’s not a problem, or that you think I have a preference for Mr. Stark. Because although it kind of seems like it, or rather it _is_ , I still like you guys the same. Or _almost_ the same. Don’t get me wrong-“ Peter is interrupted by a completely confused Clint.

“Wait, what? Sorry-“ One of his hands goes to his left ear and then the other “- I had my hearing aids off” He smiles to the kid “What were you saying?” A sight can be heard behind the camera.

“Nothing, let’s just begin”

* _Cut_ *

“How’s it living with the rest of the Avengers? Is it anything like you imagined?” Clint sits straight on his chair as he fixes his hair.

“Oh, I _love_ it. It’s like living on a hotel. Have you seen ‘The Sweet Life of Zack and Cody’? Well, I would be Zack, Steve would be Cody-“ he scratches his chin, thinking “- oh yeah, Tony would _definitely_ be Mr. Moseby. ‘ _Don’t do that Clint. I said no running in the hall Clint. Don’t touch that Clint_ ’” He mimics Tony’s voice “Then Pepper would be Maddie because she’s the smart one, and then Nat would be London, because as tough as she seems to be, she’s kind of stupid.” He smiles for a second before realizing what he said “She’s not going to see this, is she? Because I’d be dead-“

**PEPPER**

“It’s so nice to finally see you Peter” Ms. Potts says as she sits down, looking around the place. “Oh wow, you did a _great_ job with this, I’m really impressed.” One of her hands caresses the armrest of the chair. “And you even got Tony’s favorite chair? Now I _really am_ impressed.” She gives him a sweet smile.

“Thank you so much Ms. Potts! It means a lot! I wanted to make him comfortable for this. Don’t think he realized that though.”

“Well, wether he realized it or not, he definitely appreciated. I know _I_ do.”

* _Cut_ *

“Mr. Stark told me that you are the reason why he agreed to do this, is that true?” Unable to control herself, Pepper rolls her eyes.

“What did he say? That I threatened him or something, right?” Trying not to let her annoyance show, she forcefully smiles. “He’s such a drama queen sometimes. I just told him that if he allowed this, he wouldn’t have to sleep on the couch for the next 4 to 5 years.”

“Isn’t that some kind of a threat? Blackmail at least?”

“Oh no. This is something like a business deal. It’s the only way for him to listen to me. He’s like a kid. If you don’t take something from him, he doesn’t even pay attention. I sometimes wonder why I still try to work with him.” She lets out a sight “You have _no_ idea how many times I thought about just quitting when I first started as CEO.”

“But weren’t you two together by then?”

“Yes, so?” She raises an eyebrow.  


“Wouldn’t you have to deal with him either way?”

“Oh, yes. But you see. Work-related-Tony is no the same thing as day-to-day-Tony. You know this, I’m sure they’ll see it too.” Ms. Potts says as she points to the camera.

“Which one will they enjoy more?”

“Depends on their tastes. Work-related-Tony is more of a- how do I put it?- Childish and bitchy Tony. Day-to-day-Tony is a sweeter, although sometimes annoying Tony. Just take your pick.”

* _Cut_ *

**Youtube**

**Keeping Up With The Avengers (Episode I: Interviews)**

_[_ Video attached _]_

_193.8M views_

**Twitter**

IronFam _@IronFamOfficial_

_BREAKING NEWS: Peter Parker has launched a new reality show featuring the Avengers! [Link Attached]_

_2_ 60k RT 790k Likes

_StarkShark_ _@SharkoStarko_

_Oh God. The CONTENT we’ll get with this. Let’s all praise our lord and savior @UnderscoreParker_

12.7k RT 35.9k Likes

Peter Internman _@UnderscoreParker_

_You are welcome. You are more than welcome. I’m just doing my duty_

32.4M RT 43.7M Likes

You Know Who I Am @ _TonyEStark_

_Your duty? This is certainly not your duty kid. If I remember correctly, your duty is to do your homework, which you still haven’t done even though it’s almost 11pm. So get to it_

41.4M RT 57.6M Likes

Peter Internman _@UnderscoreParker_

_You can’t do that here Mr. Stark! I’m right beside you! You are making me feel like a little kid! I am a grown up human_

42.4M RT 63.7M Likes

You Know Who I Am @ _TonyEStark_

_Maybe if you stopped pouting like that, even you would believe those words_

56.4M RT 77.6M Likes

ClintyWinky @ _ClintBarton_

_For what is worth, I think it is your duty kid. It’s yours and mine to show the world how annoying Mr. Moseby can be. Maybe they’ll finally see the tyrant that is living under our roof._

6.2M RT 7.8M Likes

You Know Who I Am @ _TonyEStark_

_You better shut up Barton. Because it’s either that or repaying the 20 million dollar sculpture you broke the other day. Your pick._

26.4M RT 37.9M Likes

ClintyWinky @ _ClintBarton_

_Yeaaaah. You know what? I think I’m just going to go back to the vents._

8.5M RT 10.6M Likes

You Know Who I Am @ _TonyEStark_

_Much better_

13.4M RT 24.8M Likes

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know how this is going to evolve, but we'll see. If you've got an idea for a chapter, just let me know.
> 
> Kudos and comments are always appreciated!


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